“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” – Anaïs Nin
It takes a certain aptitude and deftness to catch yourself from falling. In pure physical terms, you need to have relatively quick reflexes and balance in order to avoid falling on your keister. The same is true in life, would you not agree? We need to be nimble, balanced and flexible to maneuver thru the many obstacles we face, self-imposed or otherwise.
In general, we tend toward what appears easier in the moment, which often means letting someone else catch us when we fall in life. I would like to pose this question to the reader: If you tripped on the sidewalk, would you wait for someone to stop your fall, or would you let your reflexes kick-in and catch yourself before falling and getting hurt? Most probably, unless you were totally unprepared or out of your body, you would stop your own fall by any means necessary. Why, then, my friend, would you wait until the “perfect person” came along to rescue you from stumbling over life’s obstacles?
Somewhere along the way, we’ve learned, been conditioned, or have chosen to allow others to “take care of us” which in theory could be very nice. Unfortunately, some of us take it to the extreme, and rather than face what we need to face (sadness, difficult transition, a need to make a radical change in life, etc.,) we defer to the easy road, which often leads nowhere productive. When we allow others to carry our burden or “take care” of us in a way that hinders our growth, we give away our power and do ourselves a great disservice.
I do not fancy myself nearly as eloquent as Anaïs Nin, so I merely emphasize her beautiful message above. There comes a time when we need to allow ourselves to grow and blossom. Now is the time for you to trust yourself, open yourself up to all the possibilities, and move forward in life. You may trip along the way, but mistakes and missteps provide learning experiences. If we are paralyzed by an impossible drive for perfection, we will surely miss out on life’s adventures. Getting past this requires courage, mindfulness and tenacity.
Many of us suffer from perfectionism (remember me? I’m the “recovering Type-A,”) and can be very hard on ourselves. This is a very difficult barrier to conquer, but I have faith that you can make it happen. When you begin trusting yourself, you will create a very different life scenario. YOU can make that change, so how will you do it? You can muddle thru, which might be the path you need to take, but if you are open to a little guidance, come with me.
Recognize the thought pattern that holds you back. Perhaps you are afraid of your own independence, so you seek out partners to take care of your financial needs. Maybe it’s easier to hover in your tight little bud and guard your heart rather than open yourself up to real, lasting love. You might even have a negative attitude toward those who have more than you, and so fall back on destructive patterns that hinder your prosperity. Name it, own it and sit with it for a few minutes. Accept it as a part of your old belief system and trust that it will soon be a distant image in the rearview mirror.
Commit to catching yourself. Promise yourself that you will embrace your independence, visualize prosperity and abundance, and allow yourself to get thru a difficult time on your own. I am not saying that you are supposed to trudge ahead alone and refuse the aid and support of friends, family and loved ones; but you are ultimately responsible for your own well-being and happiness. If you trip while walking alone on the sidewalk, who will catch you? You are not alone in life, but if you wait for someone else to do the hard work, you will be forever waiting, and will no doubt feel very frustrated.
Trust yourself (you know more than you think you do.) Take the time to recognize that you are fully capable of catching yourself. Once you have established that you are capable, and you believe it, you are on your way to taking better care of yourself, catching your own self when you stumble, and attracting the right kind of people into your life. The right people will walk beside you while you find your way. They will lift you up when you need it, but ultimately know when to give you the space and air you need to support your own self first.
Practice your craft. As with a musical instrument, sport, yoga, writing, cooking, accounting, etc., you must practice your craft. You must practice catching yourself. You have to practice establishing the awareness required to see where you need to catch your own self, and then practice, practice, practice. I do not care for the phrase, “Practice makes perfect” because aiming for perfection sets an impossibly high standard. I prefer this instead, “Practice makes progress.”*
You have the power to catch your own self; you’ve been doing it physically for years, so now muster the courage to do the same in life. When you trip over an obstacle, give yourself permission to be strong and capable. Embrace your power and courage and catch yourself before you hit the ground. If you happen to find yourself already on the ground due to old patterns, pick yourself up. Stand up, walk tall, and generate forward momentum in your life. When we are strong and confident in our own abilities, we are more attractive across the board, and ultimately will attract what we need to our lives.
You are a flower bud on the verge of blossoming. Open your heart and mind, let your strength and beauty unfold, and absorb the warmth of the sun. I wish you the best as you continue on your path.
Blessings. Gratitude. Love.
*Thanks to Baron Baptiste’s “My Daddy is a Pretzel” children’s book for this enlightened tidbit.